November 29, 2005

I HAVE MY BASES COVERED

I'm starting to notice that many people think I am overly arrogant and relentless in my assault on religion and my "belief" in a Godless universe.
This is creating three types of results from the god fearing.
First off, there are those who respect the fact I am voicing my opinion. Personally, I think they think it is cool to be friends with an Atheist:), and some are staunch believers in Free Speech as well. Ed. Note: This group also includes the rational believers who can understand and/or even see my point of view.
The second type are the evil believers. These are the God fearing self loathers who hate me because I am a Godless heathen. They call me the anti-christ, or the Devil.
And of course, they say I am going to hell for eternity. And they believe it. Personally, I feel that anyone who thinks like this, is living hell on earth, and IF hell existed, they would be the prime candidates.
Now we get to the third type. The kind of people who believe that I am being guided by the Devil. The good religious folk who pray for me and pray for my soul. I'm finding that a lot of people have told me they are praying for me. In fact, I probably have more people praying for me than they have praying for them. If God existed, I have made it on his radar screen. He is taking notice, "who is this Bacon Eating Atheist Jew?, I want this guy checked out." He probably has his top guys monitoring me right now.
With all these people praying for me, he has to appease them. He just has to.
So I'm not worried, the more I say God doesn't exist, or the more I laugh at the bible, the more I've increased my chances of eternal bliss, if such a bliss exists.

7 comments:

  1. I don't think I think it is "cool" to be friends with an atheist. It's just that you are funny and I agree with you on a lot of things, including how silly a fundmentalist reading of the world is. And in the end I think that belief in God is ultimately unprovable and a matter of faith rather than reason. I've said before that if I wasn't religious, I think I would be an atheist.

    Or, to put it another way, I try to be as rational a person as is possible for someone who tries to avoid tearing toilet paper on Shabbos :)

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  2. I wasn't referring to you. You fall in the fourth category. You can see where I am coming from. Check this site out, it is hilarious: http://www.fstdt.com/

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  3. I don't mean to spam, but anyone heard of this? http://capsurv.blogspot.com/

    Is he for real?

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  4. I keep being told that I am the devil or following his rules. Maybe we should hang out. ;)

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  5. Jack, "I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints." Saints are boring.

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  6. Okay, just to help you cover your bases, I will start praying for your sick, depraved soul. :)

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